Bill O’Reilly made an appearance on The View today and drove the washed-up, has-been Whoopi Goldberg and Joy “Who?” Behar off the set, with them ranting and sputtering the whole way out. (If only those two nincompoops didn’t bother coming back, it would have vastly improved the show, I’m sure.) At least Barbara Walters pointed out the stupidity of her colleagues to the raucous audience immediately afterwards, most of whom must have thought they came to see The View and ended up at Jerry Springer.

Here’s a video clip of the excitement:

TheSmokingGun.com reports on a crime where a man got into an argument with two teenagers over their stupid habit of wearing their pants hanging down below their asses, and ended up shooting one of them in the ass.

I can’t say that I blame him.

In fact, I think they should probably give the guy a medal instead of arresting him.

Here’s the story:

Incensed when two teenagers ignored his demands to pull up their saggy pants, a Memphis man allegedly shot one of the youths in the back, according to police.

Kenneth Bonds was arrested Saturday night and charged with two counts of aggravated assault and jailed on $25,000 bond. Bonds, 45, is pictured in the mug shot at right.

Investigators contend that Bonds admitted to shooting Cameron Tucker, 17, following a September 25 argument on a Memphis sidewalk. The teenager was accompanied by Isaac Taylor, a 16-year-old friend.

Tucker told cops that he and Taylor were walking to a candy store when Bonds “began yelling at them to pull their pants up,” according to a Memphis Police Department arrest warrant affidavit. “Bonds got angry when Tucker and Taylor refused and that’s when the three got into a heated argument,” reported police.

At that point, Bonds allegedly pulled out a pistol and fired a shot at the older boy. The shot missed, but as the boys fled, Bonds continued firing at them. One bullet hit the 17-year-old in the buttocks and exited through his thigh (the boy was treated for the wound at two different hospitals).

A witness, Percy Chalmers, told cops that he saw Bonds “pull a large black semi auto handgun from his waist band” and fire several shots. Both Tucker and Taylor were able to identify Bonds in a photo spread prepared by Memphis police.

When contacted by phone, Bonds reportedly “admitted to shooting Cameron Tucker after an argument,” according to the police affidavit. Bonds was scheduled to be arraigned this morning on the felony counts

This is just one cool kid.

In what has to be one of the strangest news stories I’ve read in a long time, a woman is intentionally trying to become the world’s fattest woman.

This stupid woman, Donna Simpson of NJ, who obviously isn’t too concerned about being alive to watch her 3-year old daughter grow up, is already 600 lbs and counting. She

eats huge amounts of junk food each week and tries to move as little as possible so she doesn’t burn off as many calories.

“I do love cakes and sweet things, doughnuts are my favourite,” she said.

Ms Simpson said she also loved eating sushi and would often eat 70 big pieces in one go.

I was debating putting her picture up here, but I don’t feel like running a freak show, and it’s really disgusting (for those more curious out there, feel free to follow the news story link and check out the picture there).

Now, keep in mind I’m not picking on people who are obese and can’t help it for whatever reason, because this is clearly not the case here. This is a person who is intentionally killing herself by stuffing her fat belly (and arteries) with all kinds of disgustingly fattening foods, and without a care in the world, apparently.

Side note: the story doesn’t even stop there with the bizarreness; here’s the last line:

In order to pay for the enormous amounts of food she is eating — her weekly grocery bill is $815 — Ms Simpson makes money by running a website where men pay to watch her consume fast food.

ABC’s Simon McGregor-Wood reports on a woman who passed away last week at the age of 99, leaving behind approximately 1,400 descendants!

Rachel Krishevsky was 19 when she married her cousin Yitzik from within the ultra orthodox Haredi community in Jerusalem. The young couple then set about following the Jewish commandment to be “fruitful and multiply.” And they certainly succeeded.

By the time she passed away last Saturday in Jerusalem aged 99, Rachel had according to her family, no less than 1,400 children, grandchildren, great grandchildren and even great-great-grandchildren.  She and her husband had seven boys and four daughters. Among the ultra orthodox jewish community large families are seen as a blessing. Each of their 11 children followed in Rachel’s footsteps, resulting in 150 grandchildren. In turn these descendants had 1,000 children of their own and in the last few years several hundred great-great-grandchildren started to appear.

According to one unnamed grandchild Wednesday, “grandma knew all of her descendants by name.”

(Credit: Caroline McCarthy /CNET)

This is one of those things that you see in science fiction movies and think to yourself, “yeah, that’s not happening anytime soon.”

Well, this time it’s different!

CNET is reporting that the September 18 issue of Entertainment Weekly magazine is going to actually have a video advertisement on one of its pages! Granted, the actual video section of the ad is only a small part of the page, and, granted, it will only be found in a fraction of their magazine run for that issue, but it’s still pretty exciting news.

It would be interesting to see if this takes off and spawns more (and better) videos ads in the near future or if this is just a fad that doesn’t catch on.

Makes me think sadly about the Roomba. At the time it came out, everyone got all hyped up about how after decades of speculation as to the potential of robots, we have finally made them evolved enough to actually perform a useful task—vacuuming a room! There was so much talk of what would be next and how in five years, we’d have robots putting toys away, cleaning windows, making lunch, etc… and where are we now?

Still vacuuming.

So, while this is exciting news in its own right, I would be hesitant to drum up any hopes of rapid progression from this little limited video to anything widespread anytime soon.

As if I don’t have enough things to worry about in today’s crazy world, I now apparently have to worry during my commute about who’s driving my train.

NBC News reports that a train operator has apparently gotten caught on camera letting what seems to be her 8-year-old son drive the subway train!

A 41-year old lawyer caught it on camera, not believing what he was seeing and hearing, as he witnessed the train operator coaching the boy:

“It’s green, speed up,” and “Yellow, slow down,” he recalled the operator saying.

What the hell is wrong with people?!?

FoxNews is reporting that several consumers recently noticed charges on their credit cards of about $23 quadrillion, some of them for buying a mere pack of cigarettes!

Josh Muszynski, one of the consumers, swiped his card when buying a pack of cigarettes at a gas station and later in the day noticed a charge for $23,148,855,308,184,500 on his credit card. “I thought somebody had bought Europe with my credit card,” was his response (not knowing, of course, that these days Europe can be had for bargain basement prices).

This appears to have been some system glitch at Visa and has affected several people.

Crazy!

UPI is reporting that Israel is developing freeze-dried blood powder, whereby soldiers can carry pouches of their own freeze-dried blood that can be used for emergency medical treatment by just adding water! This is among several other new lifesaving devices invented by Israelis also mentioned towards the end of the report.

I hope that all those who boycott Israeli products add these inventions to their blacklist. Then maybe if they ever find themselves in sudden need of these products, they can spend the remaining few minutes of their lives contemplating the depths of their own hatred and anti-Semitism.

While I am extolling the inventiveness of Israelis and how they really look to make our lives safer, better, and more convenient, I must also mention another recent invention of theirs: the MagShoe.

As anyone who has traveled by air knows, one of the biggest annoyances in air travel is being forced to remove your shoes to run them through the detectors. It slows down the security lines, it gives you yet another thing to scramble to do after walking through the metal detector, and occasionally exposes you to all sorts of frightening odors.

Well, the MagShoe solves all that. After walking through the metal detector—with your shoes on—you step on a small platform and in less that 2 seconds your shoes are scanned. No unlacing and lacing, no removing shoes, no discomfort, no delays, no odors.

You can see a demonstration of this great new technology here:

Again, I think all those who want to boycott Israeli products should be forced to wait on a separate line which requires the now-old-fashioned shoe removal process.

And speaking of the nitwit boycotters, here’s a great video to help them ensure that they are doing the most thorough job possible with their boycott:

In a 30-second video clip that must be seen to be believed, Obama swats a fly, much to the adoration and praise of his CNBC hosts.  (There’s even the close-up shot of the dead fly on the ground after having been felled by the Might Great One, Obama.)

(Hat tip to Mary Katharine Ham for this gem!)

I received the following story via another of those email forwards and found it interesting enough to share (Snopes.com vouches for the overall gist of the story, but adds that it employs a slight amount of embellishment for dramatic effect):

Click the “continue reading” link to read the story.

Unlike today’s vista of decrepit buildings, dilapidated housing and rusting junked cars, the South Bronx in 1950 was the home of a large and thriving community, one that was predominantly Jewish. Today a mere remnant of this once-vibrant community survives, but in the 1950′s the Bronx offered synagogues, mikvahs, kosher bakeries, and kosher butchers— all the comforts one would expect from a traditional Jewish community.

The baby boom of the post-war years happily resulted in many new young parents. As a matter of course, the South Bronx had its own baby equipment store. Sickser’s was located on the corner of Westchester and Fox, and specialized in “everything for the baby,” as its slogan ran. The inventory began with cribs, baby carriages, playpens, high chairs, changing tables, and toys.

Mr. Sickser, assisted by his son-in-law Lou Kirshner, ran a profitable business out of the needs of the rapidly-expanding child population. The language of the store was primarily Yiddish, but Sickser’s was a place where not only Jewish families but also many non-Jewish ones could acquire the necessary paraphernalia for their newly-arrived bundles of joy.

Business was particularly busy one spring day, so much so that Mr. Sickser and his son-in-law could not handle the unexpected throng of customers. Desperate for help, Mr. Sickserran out of the store and stopped the first youth he spotted on the street.

“Young man,” he panted, “how would you like to make a little extra money? I need some help in the store. You want to work a little?”

The tall, lanky African-American boy flashed a toothy smile back. “Yes, sir, I’d like some work.”

“Well then, let’s get started.” The boy followed his new employer into the store.

Mr. Sickser was immediately impressed with the boy’s good manners and demeanor. As the days went by and he came again and again to lend his help, Mr. Sickser became increasingly impressed with the youth’s diligence, punctuality and readiness to learn. Eventually Mr. Sickser made him a regular employee at the store. It was gratifying to find an employee with an almost soldier-like willingness to perform even the most menial of tasks, and to perform them well.

From the age of 13 until his sophomore year in college, the young man put in from 12-15 hours a week, at 50 to 75 cents an hour. Mostly, he performed general labor: assembling merchandise, unloading trucks and preparing items for shipments. He seemed, in his quiet way, to appreciate not only the steady employment but the friendly atmosphere Mr. Sickser’sstore offered. Mr. Sickser learned in time about their helper’s Jamaican origins, and he in turn picked up a good deal of Yiddish. In time young Colin was able to converse fairly well with his employers, and more importantly, with a number of the Jewish customers whose English was not fluent.

At the age of 17, the young man, while still working part-time at Sickser’s, began his first semester at City College of New York. He fit in just fine with his, for the most part Jewish, classmates — hardly surprising, considering that he already knew their ways and their language. But the heavy studying in the engineering and later geology courses he chose proved quite challenging. Colin would later recall that Sickser’s offered the one stable point in his life those days.

After signing up for an ROTC program and serving two tours of duty in Vietnam, the young man quickly rose to the top ranks of the U.S. military. In 1989, he was sworn in as the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff.

In 1993, two years after he guided the American victory over Iraq in the Gulf War, he visited the Holy Land. Upon meeting Israel’s Prime Minister Yitzhak Shamir in Jerusalem, he greeted the Israeli with the words Men kent reden Yiddish — “We can speak Yiddish.”

As Shamir, stunned, tried to pull himself together, Colin Powell – now U.S. Secretary of State — continued chatting in his second-favorite language. He had never forgotten his early days in the Bronx.